You done laughing?
Let me tell you how I choose to see a movie, before you start laughing again.
First, I have to be generally interested – that’s changing and getting harder to do as I get older. Second, when the movie comes out, I’ll read Roger Ebert’s review. He’s a candy man: he likes a lot of movies and rates them high. Then, I’ll read what the reviewers at the Globe And Mail write about it: they hate everything just to spite you. They’re the snotty type that criticize everything because their own lives have no happiness.
Based on their reviews and these rules, I’ll then deem the movie worthy of viewing:
- Ebert gives it ** or lower: don’t see it.
- Ebert gives it *** and Globe And Mail gives it **: worth seeing.
- Ebert gives it *** or higher and Globe And Mail gives it ***: go see it.
- Ebert gives it **** and Globe And Mail gives it ****: ha ha, that’s a trick – Globe And Mail doesn’t give anything worth seeing ****. Anything with **** from the Globe And Mail may be truly brilliant, but watching them is usually is super depressing and you would never, ever want to see the movie again. (Some examples: Monster’s Ball, Monster). I’ve stopped doing it.
Where was I?
Oh yeah, Mr & Mrs Smith. It passed rule 3. The Globe And Mail was right, it was a good movie for the first two acts, but then devolved to an action movie in the third. But the first two acts are totally worth it. And hey, it broke up a real marriage, right?
Recommended.